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Friday 29th May 2009, saw KCC’s annual sportsmans dinner, held in the Park Suite at Rugby Park. A packed audience, had a thoroughly entertaining night hosted by Alan Hill, who defied doctors orders in coming along as he twisted his ankle getting out of a bunker whilst playing golf – and you thought Chippy’s injury excuses were bad!!! Also in attendance was Arran’s answer to Robo Cop, however thanks to his ever gaining girth, Ironside would be more apt. This was all the more special as he turned up a week early, 22nd instead of 29th and demanded to gain entry to the Jehova’s Witness prayer meeting that was taking place. Thing is he sat there for an hour and didn’t know the difference! There was a time when the police were the pillars of the community, obviously Scott hasn’t moved into mainland time as yet and is stuck in Arran time.

First up was the leg end of Argentina, Alan Rough, now of Real Radio fame. Alan gave a resume of his playing career, which at times was very funny. A few of stories that stuck in my mind were: -

• When asking Andy Goram how he got over a bad game, Goram replied that he went home, took his wife upstairs, undressed her and made passionate love to her. A couple of weeks later Goram bumped into Rough and asked him if his advice worked as Rough had a particularly poor match. Rough replied yes it had worked brilliantly and also that Goram had a lovely home!!

• Another was the story about Rough, not having saved a penalty in 18 months, found himself in a penalty shoot out whilst playing for Partick Thistle. Having kept up his immaculate record and missed the first 4 penalties, he saw Jimmy Bone running round the track to speak to him. Rough was understandably angry and told Bone to f**k off with his advice as he knew nothing about goalkeeping. Bone replied that he wasn’t giving him any advice, he was taking over in goal as Bertie Auld felt he had more chance of saving one.

• Yet another was about his time in Argentina when Ally McLeod told the squad he thought that they were too uptight and should go out have a few pints and enjoy them selves as “the match wasn’t until tomorrow.” McLeod must have had some cricketing blood in him!!

Rough was followed up by last year’s star turn, Sandy Strang. Sandy once again didn’t disappoint and his wide ranging speech had all in attendance in stitches with, amongst others, his tales of Paisley and cricket. Paisley, now known as the holding pen for the Jeremy Kyle show. He also related a story about the young Scottish Asian cricketer Majid Haq, who went to Pakistan to improve his cricket. When he went into the travel agent in Lahore to book a one way flight back to Glasgow he was asked if Pollockshaws East or West was his destination. Sandy also compared the auction, which saw fierce bidding especially from that young Fenwick Turk, Duncan Hamilton, who thought that it was a badge of honour to try and out bid himself. Once was maybe understandable however 3 times … Must be something in the water in Fenwick. Top bidding went to the signed Samuel Eto’o, Barcelona strip, which drew in an amazing Ł220. Thanks to everyone who donated a prize, to those who bid and won and to those who lost, try again next year.

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On Friday night (13 June) the club held its’ first annual sportsman’s dinner at the park suite. The night proved to be a massive success for the club with a substantial amount of money being made which will allow the club to continue to thrive. Many thanks have to go to sponsors Abbotsinch Tyres and Exhausts of 115 St Andrews Steet Kilmarnock, MD Physiotherapy of Kilmarnock, and Campbell Dallas of Glasgow. We would also like to show our appreciation for everyone who turned up and helped the club raise some much needed cash but most importantly made it such a good night. Although the club is going through somewhat of a slump on the park it is going through a revival off of it and this was summed up by president Alan Hill who said “Although we are struggling for form we now have a new ground, do not have the crippling debt of a decade ago, have more than enough senior players to put out two teams on a Saturday but most importantly we are putting out under 11s, 15s and 18s sides.” This is important to remember for many Kilmarnock cricket club fans is that although we are struggling on the field the club is now in the position to move forward and nights like this will only help.